24/11/2016 - 09:10:22
There’s only one day in the whole year that sees shoppers transform from cordial citizens to savage shoppers, and beware because it’s coming our way.
Black Friday is on November 25 and, if you don’t know already, retailers will be dropping their prices for one day only, offering huge discounts and deals on absolutely anything and everything.
It's not as big a deal here as it is in the US but it is getting that way. Here's a guide to how to deal with the mayhem if it comes to it.
1. You’ll force yourself to stay awake, no matter what time you have to get up in the morning, to grab the best items online as soon as the price tags drop at midnight.
via GIPHY
2. But you’ll be faced with the blow to the system when you realise you weren’t the only bright spark with the ingenious plan , and even accessing the retailer’s site is a task in itself.
3. And when the agonising wait is finally over, that 46-inch TV you had your heart set on will be out of stock, and you’re left to make that split-second decision whether or not you’d prefer the 50-inch or Christmas dinner this year.
via GIPHY
4. Some will strive for the instant gratification of holding the bargain in their hand, and will brave the cold, dreary weather conditions to queue outside their favourite shops at ridiculously early times in the morning.
5. Having visited the store the week before to figure out its exact layout, you’ll know exactly where you’re headed without even having to think twice.
6. But as soon as those doors are pulled open, forget etiquette, because a stampede will undoubtedly ensue. No man, woman or child is safe.
7.
via GIPHY
7. You’ll have to battle your way through the pointy elbows and giant handbags of the manic shoppers to reach the right corner of the shop.
8. By which time there’ll only be one beloved item left on the shelf. Your shame goes out the window and you will grapple, claw and tackle other bargain hunters for it, like you’re carnivores in the animal kingdom fighting over a piece of meat.
9. You’ll grab everything your fingers touch without even looking at it, just in case. There’s always time to review these bonuses in the mile-long queue at the checkout.
10. Talking of tills, at least one POS system will fail. The sales associate at the cash register will probably crumble and cry under the pressure.
via GIPHY
11. The police will be called to tame the madness, and at least one person will be arrested.
12. When you’re finally sitting in your car, which is parked more than a mile away from the actual shop, you’ll do a little celebration dance.
via GIPHY
13. And once you’re in the safe comfort of your own home, you’ll line your shopping bags on your bed and just stare at them, with pride swelling in your chest.
14. And although you promised yourself you’d get at least half of your Christmas presents sorted, you’ll realise you haven’t bought a single one. But on the plus side, you do have a new Nespresso machine.
15. The morning after the ordeal, you’ll wake up to find scratches and bruises in the most unlikely of places.
via GIPHY
16. But the pain of your injuries soon subside as soon as you check your bank balance.
via GIPHY